Tag Archives: Going Home

The Wednesday Astrology Edition

14 Apr

Today’s horoscope is, as usual, freakishly on point. I haven’t checked it in a few days because I simply haven’t thought about it but today’s is definitely worth sharing.

A Gray Presence

You will experience today a conflict between your sense of duty and discipline on one hand and your desire to enjoy yourself or relate to others on the other. If you feel emotionally cold today despite the overtures of a loved one, it is best to do nothing. You should not pretend to have emotions that you do not feel, because of a misguided sense of duty; the other person will sense this and it will only increase the hurt. Loneliness and self-pity sometimes come with this influence. You feel surrounded by bright, positive energies that you simply cannot relate to. You may feel like a gray presence among colorful people. Do not take such feelings seriously, unless you have them frequently. In general today, you may encounter aspects of yourself that you would prefer not to face.

I’ve definitely been feeling down over the last few days and it’s probably because of the change in weather, which has shifted back to colder temps. I think I just really miss Arizona. I miss the smell of the orange blossoms during this time of year and how their scent seems to take over the entire town as they bloom. I miss the brilliant sunsets and all of the beautiful colors that adorn the sky each time the day turns to night. I miss my girlfriends and going to Mill Avenue for the millionth time and never getting sick of it. I miss my perfect apartment and coming home from school or work to be greeted by my prissy Siamese cat, Peaches Honey Blossom.

Peaches & I at our first apartment in Mesa, AZ.

I miss Peaches so so so much because she was the one piece of Arizona that I could bring back to New Jersey with me. She was my reason for living, for continuing to make it work no matter how hard things got, and she was my driving force in returning to Arizona as soon as humanly possible. Although having Bellatrix is definitely a blessing, she is nothing like Peaches and I knew when we got her that I couldn’t try to replicate Peaches, but I can’t help feeling like I wished Bella was more like her. And I’m sure I’m feeling that way because I’m wishing Bella was more like Arizona, more laid back, more of a reminder of the place I love so much, but I digress.

There are the many obvious benefits to being home for this temporary period but I’m too emotional to be okay with them all the time. I wake up every day wishing I could walk outside and see a palm tree or cactus in the landscaping. Instead, I don’t even bother going outside because I hate the way the scenery looks here. I don’t like these half-naked trees and how they seem to take an eternity to bloom into a more aesthetically pleasing view. But I’ve got to tell myself, to drill it into my mind, that this is only temporary and that I’ve got to continue to work hard, to keep myself focused on the goal, and that the three of us–Ben, Bellatrix, and Myself–will soon return to the desert.

We will return very soon.

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